I also believe that there are some seasons that are common. And sometimes, those seasons are just plain harder than others, and it's normal for them to be that way.
I wish I could fling open the doors of the Christian women world and proclaim:
"It's ok if you don't always have things together, because you are living life, and because life can be hard!"
I felt like the first couple of months of motherhood often saw me drained of the ability to give much to anyone except for my baby. I had moments when I only had enough capacity to make sure he was taken care of.
I should have understood that this was more than normal. I should have reminded myself that all through life, there are different stages (and even different days) that just will take more out of us than others.
However, all I could feel was guilt and shame. The burden of my desires versus my capacity weighed down on my shoulders. Even as I type, I feel it teasing to jump right back on if I do not choose to cast it off.
I have multiple friends who just recently had babies. If I could say anything to a brand new mom, it would be that sometimes, being the best mom possible will take everything you have. Sometimes, it takes all your energy. Sometimes, you have little left to give, and God only fills you for that day's tasks. This is ok! It's easier to find joy for the moment God has equipped you for without worrying about tomorrow.
There is no guilt in that, no shame. There may be lonely days. It can be hard. It can be thankless, yet it is also possibly one of the most all-encompassing ministries you can even think of taking on. It is fulfilling in the biggest possible way and draining at the very same moment.
Thankfully, we can be relieved by the fact that our Father created these processes. He knows that there are moments when we feel like we have more to give and moments when our children need all of us. Somehow, He made motherhood so rewarding that we wouldn't want it any other way.
Thanks, Dreampop Media for taking pictures of us.
Amen!!!! This is so true! Well said and thank you for letting me know I'm not the only Mom that feels like this on most days.
ReplyDeleteIt's funny how the first part of motherhood seems so hard, and while things have gotten way easier (with a good eater and sleeper), yet there are still some days when it is just exhausting!
DeleteFulfilling and draining, yes. And super-important ministry work,right there in your sleep deprived and unappreciated self! Cherish the days and keep first things first. Thank you for being real.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful, honest description of motherhood! My life is so loud and chaotic with 5 kids, including an 11 month old, and trying to homeschool this year. My house is a wreck! I try really, really hard to get everything done. There is just not enough time in the day -- ever -- for perfect. Just last night, we got home from a birthday party where the house, of course, was immaculate. I looked around my kitchen, dishes stacked topsy-turvy, and thought, "This is me right now. And it is absolutely OK!"
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